Near Miss, Four Hits, and a Torcon 9 Craft Project
March 3, 2012
Yesterday’s tornadoes apparently filled a month’s quota on tornadoes for the United States, awful in every way.
We in Nashville were lucky to dodge the worst of it, though we did get a midafternoon dose of crazy that resulted in a) quality time in our basement, b) hail the size of golf balls, so remarkable that Facebook erupted in pix of amazed Nashvillian hands displaying huge pearls of the stuff, and c) such widespread minor damage that the Tennessean quickly cooked up blazing headline coverage of the fact that insurance will likely cover your dented car.
The hail was really something, LOUD, nature’s equivalent of chucking rocks at your house.
When we emerged from our bunker, the kitchen was covered in shards of glass, four panes busted.
(Untempered glass, my son pointed out, then suggested that we replace every window in the house with tempered glass, which IS a good idea, and sounded so much like something his father would say that it made my teeth ache with tenderness.)
The only evidence of what had caused this mess: small puddles of water. It was like somebody had murdered my windows with an icicle.
In the interest of reducing crime (sad to read that the originator of the “broken window” theory of crime reduction* just died), I immediately beelined for my stash of tornado repair materials to patch up the windows.
Feel free to clip ‘n’ save this tutorial for the time you need to patch up windows busted out by golf-ball-size hail.
FEMA says to use Martha Stewart Craft Paper because it’s so nice. I used it because bandanas are just so freakin cheerful.
Trim your cardboard for a nice fit. Miter those corners!
As so often happens with projects involving materials made by Martha Stewart, this got tedious pretty fast.
There are other options available, just saying.
* When a window is broken and someone fixes it, that is a sign that disorder will not be tolerated. But an unrepaired broken window is a signal that no one cares, and so breaking more windows costs nothing.