Learn how to crawl: the New York City Yarn Crawl is on through Sunday, September 25.

About Schmirthdays


Dear Ann, On this lovely spring Saturday, I’m in Omaha for an impromptu all-sibling rally to celebrate our dad’s 80th. The fact that my perpetually boyish pops is 80 (four score! 4/5 of a century!) is surreal, as is the notion that we wisps of children are well into middle age. Age and maturity are separate tracks, apparently. We’re having lots of laughs, and tacos, and wandering the landscape of malls, bars and highways that...

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Stitches Per Dollar Is The New Gauge

Stitches Per Dollar Is The New Gauge - 1

Dear Ann, I saw an ad on Ravelry that tickled me for some reason. It was a photo of an exquisitely translucent lace stole, accompanied by this copy: “BAD ECONOMY? LACE IS CHEAP.” Now that’s telling it like it is, sistah! It makes sense: since yarn is priced by weight, the thinner it gets–the closer to laceweight– the more stitches–and hours– you can knit, for less money. Sheer knits,...

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Hallucinatory Pre-Loadout Knitting Episode

Hallucinatory Pre-Loadout Knitting Episode - 1

Dear Kay, I’m trying to get me, my junk, and also two children (who I am going to maintain are not junk even though they will still fit into a canvas tote bag if I fold them up right) up to Monteagle for the summer, and it’s frankly not going very well. I have NEVER in all my knitting days had such colossal indecision. Everything looks interesting; nothing looks interesting. I sit and stare into my bin of sock yarn and think, Socks?...

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Missing, Inaction

Missing, Inaction - 1

Dear Kay, Oh, for pity’s sake, what a little stretch this has been. One Thing After Another. The end of school, the gearing up for summer. I’ve survived the karaoke booth at the school carnival, three field trips, one near elbow-break on a nine year old, a psychologically challenging trip to Costco (involving questions such as “A gallon of canola oil? I bought a gallon of canola oil?”). Ach, oy, crikey. The net result of...

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Moments and Situations

Moments and Situations - 1

Dear Kay, I’m not going to sugarcoat this: this Belinda wrap I’m making for you has not been without its challenges. It may be the easiest lace pattern on earth, but let me tell you, there have been moments on this project. Moment No. 1: To make the second half of this shawl, you pick up stitches along one edge of the first half, then knit the same stitch pattern perpendicular to the first half. Straight needles make the constant...

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