Need a holiday handknit? Time for a Schmatta!

For the Love of Miters (and each other)

For the Love of Miters (and each other)

Dear Ann, You know I have a soft spot for miters. So you will understand why I went all wobbly in the lower lip when I saw this project. Once in a while a group knitting project really comes together, and is beautiful on the inside AND the outside; there is soul in the gesture and in the object itself. The phrase “greater than the sum of its parts” comes to mind. I hope it has magical, mitered healing powers. It sure looks like...

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The Power of Collective Thinking About Square Shapes

The Power of Collective Thinking About Square Shapes

Dear Ann, I’m on the jitney bus to Southampton, soaking up the delicious free wifi. Our house out here is an Internet-free zone, which forces us into all kinds of involuntary wholesome activity not involving sitting on our butts staring at the screen. Not that sitting on our butts staring at the screen is a bad thing, mind you– I’m all for it! But for a few precious weeks and days of the year, we choose to spray water at...

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Miters of the Corn

Miters of the Corn

Dear Ann, When Amber comes over, here’s the script: “AMBER COMES OVER: A SCENE IN ONE SCENE” [Amber and Kay embrace while jumping up and down and squealing, you-just-made-the-cheerleading-squad style.] Amber: Miters! Kay: Mitersmitersmiters! [More jumping, now spinning.] Kay: STRIPES! Amber: Stripes YES! [Yarn now tumbling out of plastic bags as jumping slows due to advancing age of one and advancing pregnancy of the...

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Orange You Glad You Weighed In?

Orange You Glad You Weighed In?

Dear Kay, Fascinating. Absolutely fascinating. I have been riveted as I’ve read everybody’s thoughts about the fate of the border of the tweedy squares blanket. The thing is, each argument for a particular border idea makes perfect sense. So much sense that as I read all the ideas, I decided that the only way to sort it all out was to count all the responses. Consider the tally: 1. Finish the border as is, 10 rows of orange: 23 2....

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Stuck

Stuck

Dear Kay, I really need some advice. It’s like I’m paralyzed with indecision. No, it’s not like I’m paralyzed; I AM paralyzed. I can barely move my fingers to type this. I Do Not Know What To Do. The good, great news is that I have crossed Finish Line 1 (knitting the squares of this blanket), Finish Line 2 (sewing the squares together), and FInish Line 3 (sewing in all the ends). My euphoria at hitting these marks was...

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What The Heck Would You Do In a Situation Like That?

What The Heck Would You Do In a Situation Like That?

Dear Ann, The problem with quoting Napoleon Dynamite, I’ve discovered, is that people don’t know it’s Napoleon Dynamite; they think it’s you, sounding only slightly more stupid and angry than usual. But I find my inner Napoleon comes bubbling to the surface a lot. Especially when my most sweet ideas go awry, and my skills let me down. Remember the bright idea I had to knit half a blanket in doubled Cascade 220, and...

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Punch List

Punch List

Dear Ann, There have been kind requests for a virtual tour of our apartment after 9-months-that-we’re-calling-6-months of renovation. There have been sweet compliments about the dotty chair and seemingly vast kitchen sink (a trick of photography; it’s a regular double sink; stick a camera on the edge of your kitchen sink, and marvel at the canyon of stainless steel). I would be thrilled to relive each and every olive hinge (to...

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Ruh Roh

Ruh Roh

Dear Ann, I’ve had a bit of a relapse. It started innocently, with half a baby blanket, for Afghans for Afghans’ initiative to help new mothers in Afghanistan. (HEY GUESS WHAT? THEY EXTENDED THE DEADLINE TO MAY 25! I think they need more blankets.) Amber is making the other half. No big whoop. This is not a slippery slope. This…. ..is not…. ….a slippery….. …..slope. Whoa, Nellie! Now...

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It Makes The Knees Go Weak

It Makes The Knees Go Weak

Dear Ann, I believe you know of my affection for the Frick Collection. You walk in, and no matter how many times you’ve seen Mr. Frick’s pictures, the amazement washes over you anew. There is a numbered plaque beside most of the paintings. You walk up to the painting, you punch the number into your Acoustiguide, and you get a short description in a charming foreign accent (sometimes Brit, sometimes French, and sometimes a lady...

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The Beverly Hillblankie

The Beverly Hillblankie

Dear Ann, OK. Let me just lay an image on you. I was going to show this to you when you were here in person last week, but to tell the truth I wasn’t brave enough to risk your unrehearsed reaction. This thing requires a couple of seconds to take it in, compose oneself, and think of something superfakeynice to say. I give you, the Abe Blankie: Green Acres is the place to be Farm Living! is the life for me Land spreading out so far and...

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