Is Starshower the new Honey Cowl? Only time will tell (but it looks good).

A Contest AND a Free Pattern

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Dear Kay,
Well, Buffy bid a hale ‘n’ hearty farewell, taking her kids, her sixteen binders of schoolteacher stuff, and the Buffy Pantry which goes with her wherever she travels. The Pantry is a cardboard box containing all the necessities of life. Let’s just say: the likelihood that she would run out of Carnation Instant Breakfast while visiting me = zero point zero.
As MobileCom Buffy faded in the distance, I prepared the shack for our next visitors, Landy of Scotland. Landy and her twins arrived ready to soak up the atmosphere of Monteagle, and I was proud of the way her children instantly embraced the Snack Shop here, which is known mostly as Breakfast for Children If Candy Is What You Feed Your Children for Breakfast. Landy, who steadfastly refuses to knit despite the overwhelming knittiness of Scotland, brought me a present she rescued from North Berwick’s charity shop:
scotspatterns5.jpg
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“Excuse me, ma’am, but will you marry me?”
scotspatterns3.jpg
“Hey, Gloria, my subscription to Ms Magazine is about to expire!”
Now. We haven’t had a contest in a long time, so here’s a little Midsummer’s Caption Contest. What are these men saying?
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Leave a comment with your entry, and include an email address. Deadline for entries is Friday, July 27, 6 pm, Central Daylight Time. I’ll announce the winner that night.
The prize:
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Two skeins of merino/tencel hand-dyed, HANDSPUN yarn from Lynne Vogel. The only reason I can bear to offer these skeins as a prize is that I know exactly where to get more . . .
A Visit from Lynne Vogel
Lynne came by the other day and brought me two treats: the flowers above and a copy of her new book. I can’t believe she just showed up at the door. Very cool. Her Twisted Sisters Sock Book is pretty much a classic. Now, she takes on the subject that challenges us all: fit. The Twisted Sisters Knit Sweaters: A Knit-to-Fit Workshop is really juicy and filled with diagrams and how-to and colorful photos. Ann Budd was one of her editors on this book, so you know it’s going to be solid.
Lynne is so consumed by fit that she just published a separate website on creating fitted sweaters, Fit Central. She just couldn’t wait to put it in another book. She’s fit crazy, that one.
A Free Pattern for You, Dear Knitter
I finished scarf number 3 for Blue Monarch, the organization here that helps women in need.
bluemonarchscarf.jpg
We were given yarn to use for these scarves: you’re looking at Lion Brand Color Waves, colorway Wow What a Very Blue Shade of Blue–I Mean, That is Blue.
If you’re looking for an easy scarf pattern for the the Orphan Foundation’s Red Scarf Project, here you go. This ruffly scarf can be as long as you like–just remember that by the end, you have four times the number of stitches you started with. It’s all garter, all the time.

Ruffly Scarf
Using bulky yarn and a size 13 (9mm) 24″ circular needle, cast on 100 stitches. Knit 3 rows. On Row 4, knit in the front and back of each stitch. (200 stitches) Knit 3 rows. On Row 8, knit front and back of each stitch. (400 stitches) Knit 3 rows. Cast off.

My last day in Monteagle is Friday–we’re heading for a fambly gathering next week. I can hear the Grundy County High School marching band practicing already. Could there be a more poignant sound?
Love,
Ann

Tags:

354 Comments

354 Comments

  1. Here’s my entry:
    “Hey Barbie, can I be your Ken?”

  2. My caption (in honor of Matt LeBlanc’s 40th birthday today):
    “How you doin?”
    Jen

  3. Wow – those old patterns are fabulous! I think the men’s caption could read, “Egad, Ken! Why aren’t you wearing your belt and scarf? You really must accessorize!”

  4. “Queer Eye For the Star Trek Guy”

  5. Robin: “Holy molars! Am I ever glad I take good care of my teeth!”
    Batman: “True. You owe your life to dental hygiene.”

  6. Please’ Scotty beam me out of here!

  7. I thought sure THE BOY’s were saying, “This get-up makes me feel a bit Robin Hoodish….Ha, ha, well then that would make ME Friar Tuck!”.
    Love seeing and getting the patterns. Again, welcome back. xoxo M.

  8. Caption contest entry:
    Steve: I’m so happy my girlfriend dragged me to this Renn Fest, for I’ve finally found my life’s calling. Good sir, may’st I offer my humble financial planning services to thine Monkees-cover-band motorcycle gang?
    Thad: Huzzah!

  9. I just can’t think of anything funnier & more fitting than “Queer Eye for the Star Trek guy” – Good one Julie!!

  10. The men are clearly playing the role of the two prices from Into the Woods:
    “Am I not sensitive,
    Clever,
    Well-mannered,
    Considerate,
    Passionate,
    Charming,
    As kind as I’m handsome
    And heir to a throne?”
    (And these leather pants chafe!)

  11. I don’t really think I can compete with Julie’s but here I try:
    Blue Sweater: I think this blue really sets off my eyes, and the scarf will look great in my Aston Martin.
    Orange Sweater: My agent is so fired.

  12. The joke is on us; they aren’t saying anything because they’re WAX!!

  13. “With this new sweater and scarf, I’m bound to be cast as the next new James Bond! Shaken, not stirred, Baby!”

  14. The joke is on us; they aren’t saying anything because they’re WAX!!

  15. “Jim, how do we tell Uhuru that we don’t need sweaters on a spaceship?”
    “I…don’t… know… Spock. She just won’t stop knitting!”

  16. Ken, tell Barbie that next time I want mohair or I am done with these shoots.

  17. “How come I always have to play Spock? And I don’t remember him wearing a scarf…”

  18. I could have sworn the caption was:
    “Batman and Robin: Casual Friday”
    …but I see that other commenters beat me to the idea!

  19. “Alright, already! I agree… it’s your turn to be Captain Kirk and I’ll be Spock!”

  20. Guy 1: Just call me Ken.
    Guy 2: Just call *me* anatomically correct (leer).

  21. Mr.Orange sweater is saying through clenched teeth to Mr. Blue sweater…”OK, I’ll PRETEND I’m interested in those women over there but we ARE going to the bar right after this ok honey?..sheesh, how did I ever let you talk me into this gig…”

  22. No, honey, we weren’t re-enacting that scene from Brokeback Mountain . ..

  23. Orange sweater guy: You can buckle my swash any time. (wink wink)

  24. Blue Sweater: “Hey…she’s giving ME the eye, don’t you think?”
    Orange Sweater: “In YOUR dreams!”

  25. I am not eligible to enter but I do have a challenge for my co-bloggette: first one to coerce her respective Hubby or Hubbo to wear belt over sweater gets free Amstels for life. CAN YOU IMAGINE? Hubbo has issues with TOGGLES. Hubby has issues with WAISTLINE. We must make this photo happen. xoxo Kay

  26. “Darling, I just saw Marianne Faithfull getting out of that sportscar, but Mick Jagger is much cuter!”

  27. OK, I’m entering anyway, in the category of Non Star Trek Non Batman Non Ken:
    [Singing] “I am a lineman for the coun-teeee!”

  28. A la the running joke in “The 40 Year Old Virgin.”
    “You know how I know you’re gay?”
    “How?”
    “Only a gay guy would know that the belt isn’t enough – you need the scarf thing to really make it happen.”

  29. Mr. Blue: Scarf thrown jauntily over shoulder, check, belt buckled slightly off-center, check, knowingly raised eyebrow, check!
    Mr. Orange: Dude, we’re going for the rugged woodsy look, not the over-accessorized club in the city look! Didn’t you even *look* at the artfully out-of-focus backdrop??? Amateurs…

  30. I think they’re saying:
    “Hey did you hear Barbie broke up with Ken?”
    “She did? Cool. I am so there.”

  31. Orange sweater: Hmmmmm, the scarf maybe, but the belt? It just screams “Look at me!” and not in a good way.

  32. The guy on the left is saying:
    “Think they would give me Carson’s job on Queer Eye? I could highlight handknits and accessories!”
    Smiler: “Yeah, but we go as a matched set, we need to pitch us as a team. I could do the Decor segment!”

  33. Chuck: It takes a real man to wear an ascot, George.
    George: Chuck, that’s a scarf.

  34. “If I keep smiling, maybe that wax sculpture behind me will melt under these hot lights. Then I can score with that pretty photo assistant!”

  35. “Let’s try to look ruggedly handsome so no one notices we’re standing in front of a faux forest backdrop.”
    (beevis & butthead laugh)”Hhnh hhnh. You said faux.”

  36. Imagine one thinking bubble coming from both of them:
    “I need a cigarette.”
    But I like the wax one better.

  37. “Barry, old chap, I hate to bother you, but I need some help with this squirrel nest I have discovered on my head.”
    “Sorry, my dear Boswick, but I am having my own travails dealing with the wombat that has taken residence on my own pate!”

  38. I didn’t take time to read everyone’s response, so if this is a duplicate, I’m sorry:
    “tee hee, you have to wear the scarf & belt with yours”

  39. I didn’t take time to read everyone’s response, so if this is a duplicate, I’m sorry:
    “tee hee, you have to wear the scarf & belt with yours”

  40. “We need to hurry this up. We’ve got front row seats for the Englebert Humperdink concert and I would hate to be late!”

  41. It’s the scarf that did it!!!!! My phone number is ***-***-****!

  42. “Whaddya say we scare up some white tigers and head to Vegas?”
    That would be DH’s suggestion, which topped my own initial response of “Blue Sweater: ‘Still the prettiest!'”, so that (the first) is my entry.

  43. I can’t wait for the book!!

  44. “I’m looking for Barbie so that I can show her my 2 expressions–smile and 1/2 smile”.

  45. Yes, it’s very gay, star trek and Ken – but, come on, this is a knitting blog, right?
    Blue – Well, did you MAKE a gauge swatch?
    Brown – Let me help you fix it!

  46. “Yeah, we definitely rock this look!”

  47. In a tribute to Spartacus:
    Blue jumper: I’m Ken
    Orange jumper: No, *I’m* Ken

  48. Cue West Side Story Music:
    “I feel stunning
    And entrancing,
    Feel like running and dancing for joy,
    For I’m loved
    By a pretty wonderful boy!”

  49. Guy in blue, “I can barely get a smile out wearing this get-up”.
    Guy in red, “Just say cheese, it will be over soon and we get big bucks”.

  50. The man on the right is saying, “C’mon Spock, let’s explore the planet!”, and the man on the left is replying, “Captain, that idea is highly illogical, as are the scarf and belt I’m wearing.”

  51. They are saying:
    “We are so ready for the next Star Trek series!”
    *^v^*

  52. Holy Smokes! is it hot out here or is it just you??

  53. caption:
    “hey Tad, I bet you wish you had a spiffy scarf and belt like me.”

  54. caption:
    “hey Tad, I bet you wish you had a spiffy scarf and belt like me.”

  55. “Would you smile?! I want to get out of here.”

  56. Those patterns are so fun!
    I think the men are saying:
    “Hey Ken I just LOVE your scarf and belt..you are so style’in!”
    “Why thanks Bob, they make me feel rather snazzy. Let’s go hunt some chipmunks.”

  57. “Excuse me, but have I mentioned how much you look like Mr. Spock in that fetching sweater?”
    “Why yes you have — beam me up!”

  58. “Such fools! NOW they’re going to be sorry they didn’t select us for Star Trek!”

  59. Man in blue, eyeing buxom woods-wench: “You know, Barney, I bet a tranquilizer gun would work. We could get her down to the cabin before she wakes up.
    Man in orange: (smothered giggle) “And then, and then George, and then, we could…do stuff.”
    Man in blue: “That we could, Barney, that we could.”

  60. I see the guy in blue more as Scotty vs. Spock:
    “Aye, Captain, the new uniforms look great. Shall I beam up more yarn for the rest of the crew?”

  61. “Ken, doesn’t Barbie look simply stunning?”
    “Yes. Haven’t you noticed we match also?”

  62. OMG, these captions are too funny! I love the 40-YO Virgin reference…and I’m not sure about caption, but to me, Mr. Blue looks like Fred from Scooby Doo fell in love with Captain Kirk and Mr. Orange couldn’t be happier to get rid of him!

  63. Blue guy: “Wow, I had no idea your butt cheeks were so toned. Impressive!”
    Brown guy: “They don’t call ‘em Buns of Steel for nothin’, pal”.

  64. Of course, I meant blue guy, not brown…

  65. “We’re men, we’re men in tights…..”

  66. forget it, brown = orange… off for my lobotomy now…

  67. A rare photo of the Founding Father’s of Hairclub for Men

  68. Elvis (in blue) agrees to do a guest appearance on “Here Come the Brides” with Bobby Sherman, provided he can “jazz up” the standard issue man-tunic with some of his Vegas wardrobe. They’ll even duet on the theme song: “The bluest skies you’ve ever seen are in Seattle…hunka hunka!”
    [too obscure?] http://www.imdb.com/gallery/mptv/1415/Mptv/1415/14098_0006.jpg.html?hint=tt0062569

  69. How do you like our Star Trek knits? It gets cold in space!

  70. “Why yes, Dick, I did dress myself this morning, why do you ask?”

  71. ORange: “Hey, Peter, where did you get that belt and scarf? Raid Marcia’s closet?”
    Blue: “No, Greg. Jan gave them to me and she said she found them in YOUR dresser drawer!”

  72. Egads, Trevor! Where did you get that scarf? Mummy has one just like it.

  73. mother likes you best

  74. mother likes you best

  75. Blue Sweater: He so wishes he had thought to wear a matching scarf and belt.
    Orange Sweater: *snicker* Who wears a matching scarf and belt?

  76. Blue Man’s Bubble: I am *so* not into acrylics.
    Orange Man’s Bubble: Where do you suppose they found an orange sheep?

  77. Blue guy: Say what you want about my belt-n-scarf combo, it does the job of distracting the eye from my extra-tight pants.
    Orange guy: Hey, I’m digging my tight pants!

  78. Blue Guy: Do you think Emma Peel will like this?
    Orange Guy: No, dear boy, it is more of a Pussy Galore look.

  79. “How is it that Spock and McCoy got those jobs on the Enterprise and we didn’t?”
    Yeah, these look like alternates for Star Trek …

  80. Star Trek Chic – The Hot New Trend in Mens Wear!
    Hey Ladies, your man will love feeling just like sexy Mr. Spock or that intergalactic charmer Captain Kirk in one of these snazzy sweaters! Want your man to “boldly go where no man has ever gone before”? Well now you can live out those sci-fi fantasies with knitwear that is “out of this world”!
    **Knitwear designers not responsible for any injuries caused by over zealous application of the Vulcan Death Grip.**

  81. “How is it that Spock and McCoy got those jobs on the Enterprise and we didn’t?”
    Yeah, these look like alternates for Star Trek …

  82. hi all :)
    guy with the smile: someone got to be on top
    here are a few more:
    guy with the ascot: right after this shoot, i have a harlequin romance cover to do
    (same guy): i was a stand in for yule brenner
    guy with the smile: pants a little tight in the crotch
    peace&blessings all,

  83. Not saying – singing!
    “Sweeeet knit-stery of life, at last I’ve fouuund youuuuuu!”
    (a la Madeline Kahn in Young Frankenstein)

  84. Blue Sweater: What. Is. That. Smell?
    Orange Sweater: He who dealt it, smelt it. Huh-huh-huh-huh (Beavis laugh).
    Clearly, I am a 12 year-old boy trapped in the body of a 38 year-old woman.

  85. Rugged or Red Baron, which do you prefer?

  86. Chip: Do you think Marsha will dig me in this super groovy blue sweater?
    Doug: Don’t you mean Greg?

  87. Orange sweater: I have never been so happy to win a coin toss in my life!
    Blue sweater: When this photo shoot is over I am going to show him what I can do with this scarf and belt…..bwahaaaa

  88. “Gee officer, it seems we both just happened to pull into this highway rest stop to engage in some leaf-peeping. Isn’t the color of that maple over there just fabulous?”

  89. “Easy for him to smile… how come he doesn’t have to wear a scarf and belt?”

  90. Ken, I think it’s time to tell Barbie that we really aren’t a gay couple.

  91. Ken, I think it’s time to tell Barbie that we really aren’t a gay couple.

  92. I can’t believe she knit the WHOLE thing! :-)

  93. Orange: Your wife let you out of the house wearing that?
    Blue (thinking to himself): Let me? You should see what she knit me to wear underneath…

  94. Bob: “We’re only one red shirt away from completing our Enterprise crew!”
    John: “I hate you, Bob.”

  95. Bob: “We’re only one red shirt away from completing our Enterprise crew!”
    John: “I hate you, Bob.”

  96. I’m tickled orange just knowing that next time, it’s MY turn to go to the special accessory box.

  97. Blue: Do you thing Mavis will be jealous that I look better in her scarf than she does?
    Orange: I can work it without the scarf.

  98. “Ted, what do you say we go kill a bear for breakfast?”
    “Smashing idea, Philip – but do you think my accessories are a bit much for a hunt?”

  99. “Oh, God. I hope he gives me the Vulcan nerve pinch!”

  100. When we are famous politicians we hope no one discovers this yarn porn photo! We were so poor. We had to do it for the money to pay for getting our teeth fixed. We are so ashamed now and deeply regret -blah, blah, blah.

  101. orange guy: “How can you stand it? This sweater itches like crazy! I’m twisting in my seat here.”

  102. Orbit gum cleans another dirty mouth…
    Fabulous!

  103. Blue: “I’ll be your Moneypenny if you’ll be my Bond.”

  104. “Hey, mom I got into Yale”

  105. “I’m thinking Pullman wool is aptly named.”

  106. “Join me in a shandy down the pub, Bob?”
    “No, thanks, I prefer Carnation Instant Breakfast!”
    Now, although those guys might wear your squiggly blue scarf, I wouldn’t say it was exactly unisex in the modern world. And those red scarf folks really want unisex! Tis lovely, though.

  107. “Where’d ya come by the scarf and belt, boy?”
    “Never you mind, Elliot. Just watch the wind doesn’t knock these rugs off our heads!”

  108. Scotty, I need more power!
    Captain, me engines can’t take anymore!

  109. Filling in for the women models while they’re on strike really isn’t going to advance our careers, is it?

  110. “Artist’s rendering of the now-scarce Trekkinus Fanaticus in its most proliferous time, the late 1960’s.
    Though such examples of this particular species have dwindled in recent years, rumors of their continued existence persist. Few still bear the bright and proud plumage demonstrated by these specimens, though when they dominated the Great Nerd Plains in the 1960’s and 1970’s, herds of Trekkinus Fanaticus could be seen roaming the shopping malls and toy stores searching for sustenance in the form of memorabilia.
    While the life span of these amazing creatures is relatively long, very few managed to pass on their traits to the following generation. This is largely attributed to the fact that the females of this species are very rare, and suffer from the same grooming peculiarities that other, more plentiful and physically compatible species find off-putting. Scientists predict that the specific cocktail of genes responsible for this phenomenon will eventually fade into obscurity. And thus, the cycle of life continues.”

  111. Blue sweater: “You know if we keep posing in these sweaters people are going to think we are gay…”
    Brown sweater: “Think??? – They’ll know we are!”

  112. “My sweater is so breathtakingly Cobalt! What’s that your wearing? Brown?”
    “It’s Burnt Sienna, jackass.”

  113. “Say Tad, mom gave me those pleather pants for Christmas.”
    antmegmmm@verizon.net

  114. My hubbie’s offering is:
    “I say, Humphrey, it’s all very well being in touch with your feminine side, but you look like a right Nancy in that sweater”…..
    My offering is:
    “I say, Humphrey, if you don’t smile they’ll make you wear something even sillier in the next photo!”
    Love
    Helen

  115. Guy in front: Man that burrito was not a good thing to eat before this photo shoot…If I smile big maybe no one will notice.
    Guy in back: I look good, am suave, and…If I lean this way I will be father away from the smell.

  116. Rupert wondered if the scarf that had seemed so right was really setting off the rich wool worsted to its best advantage.

  117. “Holy Pullover, Batman! Do you think anyone recognizes us in our disguises?”

  118. Blue Sweater: “Hair Club For Men….I’m not just the president, I’m a customer!”
    Orange Sweater: “You always get to be president, why can’t I be president?”

  119. Didn’t read them all, perhaps it or something similar has been posted, but here is my entry:
    Guy on right: Take the picture already- holding this smile is killing me.
    Guy on left: No kidding. And I’ve got to ditch this scarf.
    The “Wendy” cover reminds me of some 50-60s mood music album covers I saw in Goodwill- random guy leering at random woman.

  120. Didn’t read them all, perhaps it or something similar has been posted, but here is my entry:
    Guy on right: Take the picture already- holding this smile is killing me.
    Guy on left: No kidding. And I’ve got to ditch this scarf- then I’m moving to Paraguay.
    The “Wendy” cover reminds me of some 50-60s mood music album covers I saw in Goodwill- random guy leering at random woman.

  121. Hey, Dude. I love your scarf and belt!

  122. “I wish they’d tied this scarf just a little tighter so I could have completely lost conciousness. I can still feel these pants cutting into my balls.”
    “Well, I wish my turtleneck was long enough to cover my face with, so I didn’t have to SEE your pants cutting into your balls. And what’s with that belt? Over-accessorize much?”

  123. “Yeah, sure! Of course you can smile. You’re not wearing both a scarf AND a belt ON THE OUTSIDE of your itchy sweater.”

  124. Blue: Go ahead and laugh at the accessories. You still have spinach in your teeth from lunch.
    Orange: (making a sucking sound with teeth) Real men eat quiche.

  125. Blue Man: I *so* would have made a better Captain Kirk. Just look at my eyebrow and my awesome physique in this ribbing!
    Russet Man: Heh-heh. You said “ribbing.”

  126. What we really would have liked is are Aran cardigans, but we got stuck modeling these things instead.

  127. Welcome to the “Forest of Gay Men”

  128. Blue sweater guy: Why are you so happy?
    Orange sweater guy: Because I know less is more when it comes to accessories! Ah hahaha!

  129. The clean entry:
    “Why yes, Biff, that IS a yellow-bellied sapsucker!”
    And the dirty:
    “You sure do have a purdy mouth.” (Deliverance-style)

  130. Vincent enjoys a sylvan moment wearing hand knits with his inflatable Ken doll.
    :)

  131. Vincent enjoys a sylvan moment wearing hand knits with his inflatable Ken doll.
    :)

  132. Darling did you have to make us look like twins and not a couple?

  133. “Dude, ditching the sweater get-up, i’ve got my wetsuit on underneath. Surf’s up! I’m outta here!”

  134. Wow, who CARES what they’re saying! They’re…incredible

  135. Well, well, well . . . Queer Eye for the Star Trek Guy seems ever so appropriate and funny too. My first thought was, “Gee, I hope no one knows what we just did.” I mean, look at those cat that ate the mouse smiles.

  136. Wow, who CARES what they’re saying! They’re…incredible

  137. I forgot to leave my personal info in my submission: It is slundqu000(at)aol(dot)com, and my blog is: knittingbymoonlight.blogspot.com.
    Well, well, well . . .

  138. Why yes, the belt *does* help to keep “things in place”, thanks for asking. Did Sergio knit your fab sweater as well?

  139. Shaggy: Nice ascot, Freddy.
    Freddie: Thanks, do you think Daphne will notice??
    Shaggy: I dunno. Looks like we got another mystery on our hands.

  140. Evidence the dreaded boyfriend sweaters were worn at least once. “I really hope our girlfriends get over this knitting phase soon.”

  141. Bob’N’Rob, America’s preeminent folk singing knitting duet, model their latest creations.
    (can i just say… Queer eye for the star trek guy made me laugh so very very hard!)

  142. “Hmmm, Impressive! You’re pose-able at the waist.”

  143. “Hmmm, Impressive! You’re pose-able at the waist.”

  144. [through clenched teeth]:
    “George… if you don’t stop knee-fondling mah butt… mah elbow is gonna make contact with your groin. ‘Kay now? Cheeeeese!”
    (but my vote goes to Sandra and her burrito)

  145. It is far too hot and humid to be clever, but OH! MY! GOD! I have not seen Carnation Instant Breakfast since the 80s (except in its disguise as Nesquik.)

  146. guy sitting on rock: “My God, my hemorroids are killing me!”

  147. guy sitting on rock… “Will you TAKE the picture already, my hemoroids are KILLING me!”

  148. Either Guy: I know what you’re thinking.
    Other Guy: No you don’t.
    First Guy: Yes I do.
    Other Guy: Do not.
    First Guy: Do so, do so, do so.
    [pause]
    Other Guy: What were we talking about?
    First Guy: I’m not going to tell you.
    Other Guy: That’s alright, because I know what you’re thinking.

  149. Either Guy: I know what you’re thinking.
    Other Guy: No you don’t.
    First Guy: Yes I do.
    Other Guy: Do not.
    First Guy: Do so, do so, do so.
    [pause]
    Other Guy: What were we talking about?
    First Guy: I’m not going to tell you.
    Other Guy: That’s alright, because I know what you’re thinking.

  150. [sorry about the double post - i'm new at this!]

  151. Guy on the Left: Hmph. The sweater wasn’t bad enough, they had to make me wear the tool-less tool belt and the Liberace neck scarf???
    Guy on the Right: tee hee hee. You look stupid.

  152. Does this belt make me look fat?

  153. Blue: “Hey Thad, should we catch the 10:10 showing of Brokeback Mountain”
    Orange: “That sounds swell, Jon! Let me grab my Binaca and I’m ready to go!”

  154. Love the vintage books, bought some myself this year at the handworks gallery.
    My reference (I tried not to read ahead so forgive me if it is a dupe)–
    Blue Man: Okay, if you smile and get the women to come closer, I’m sure I can take McCoy.
    Orange: Okay, Kirk is ALL mine.

  155. [singing] “I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay…”

  156. Orange; I think I sat in come cat doody
    Blue: Tsk, you get all the good places to sit.

  157. My caption:
    “Smile for the ladies!”
    “Easy for you to say, you don’t have a stupid ascot and belt cutting off your circulation.”
    sjmercure@hotmail.com

  158. “it’s what you wear
    from ear to ear (ear to ear)
    and not from head to toe
    that matters”
    [anyone remember "Annie"?]

  159. I think people will be able to tell us apart now that I’m wearing the scarf and belt.

  160. dang it, capt kirk! you beamed us into an alternate dimension wear we can only wear badly knit sweaters!!

  161. Is this where we go for the Ken-doll auditions?

  162. Gee Biff, that scarf and belt look just SWELL with that sweater.

  163. My entry: “I say, Randy, you look positively fetching in that darling outfit.”
    Ann

  164. Here’s hubby’s suggestion:
    Blue: “Why did I let you talk me into wearing this lame scarf and belt?”
    Orange: “Oh, just be quiet and try it on! We need clothes for the trip to Massachusetts, and besides, I want something timeless and classy for our wedding pictures.”

  165. Here’s hubby’s suggestion:
    Blue: “Why did I let you talk me into wearing this lame scarf and belt?”
    Orange: “Oh, just be quiet and try it on! We need clothes for the trip to Massachusetts, and besides, I want something timeless and classy for our wedding pictures.”

  166. OOPS! Forgot to add my email:
    bobbie_wallace@comcast.net
    tiggywinkleknits.blogspot.com

  167. Mary’s comment about Elvis and Bobby Sherman is right on the money!

  168. I swear I am not gay. The photographer made me wear this ridiculous scarf and belt!

  169. Why no Joe, I don’t have any more hair polish…

  170. Take the picture quick before I burst out laughing…

  171. Blue sweater “man”: Isn’t great to be gay?
    Brown sweater “man”: You bet. I’m glad the curse of the love sweater doesn’t apply to our boy friends.
    Blue sweater “man”: But I know how to make my sweater look good. It’s all about accessorizing darling…

  172. “Beg pardon….may we please be excused? These leather pants and thongs are starting to bind a wee bit.”

  173. Pullman WoolMan Blue: Why no Chip, I don’t think the scarf-belt combo makes me look like a modern day Peter Pan. This look is what gets me the Laaaaadies.
    Pullman WoolMan Orange: Ha, Ha, Ha. Oh Steve. You’re an idiot.

  174. Dueling Rib Knits:
    Blue Crew: “Don’t give up on me, baby. Just give me one more try…”
    Orange T-Neck: “Julie, Julie, Julie, do you love me? Julie, Julie, Julie, do you care?”

  175. Oh Muffin??? Is this scarf just too much with the belt? I certainly don’t want to be over the top with this look. Isn’t it fab???

  176. weren’t the scarves for the red scarf project supposed to be unisex? it takes a special kind of guy to wear ruffles, lol.
    and my caption?
    “dude, what’s that smell? are you wearing ACRYLIC!?”

  177. Maybe no dialogue, just a cheesy soundtrack.
    :: bow-chicka-wow-wow ::

  178. (bottom gentleman)”Hey there, did you know that I could be Mark Consualos’s twin?”, (top guy) “Well, I’ll be!”

  179. Orange Guy– I have no genitalia and I feel fabulous!
    Blue Guy– What’s genitalia?
    Sorry, someone had to go there…

  180. (Ken, in orange…) Oooh, I am sooo glad that Mattell finally made a friend for ME, but I really can not believe they gave him a belt AND a scarf!

  181. (Ken, in orange…) Oooh, I am sooo glad that Mattell finally made a friend for ME, but I really can not believe they gave him a belt AND a scarf!

  182. No, wait, now I have it…
    Blue sweater: Really, you think the belt is too much?

  183. Planetary Life reading negative captain. Beam us up Scotty.

  184. “Steve, what do you think? Is the scarf saying jaunty and sophisticated or pirate?”

  185. “Does Barbie know you borrowed her scarf AND her belt?”

  186. Blue Sweater “This sweater is so flippin’ itchy I’ll go beserk if I feel this belt chafing me for one minute more!”
    Orange Sweater “Lucky for me this is cashmere!”

  187. “Reckon either of us will ever get a date after this?”
    “Not a chance. I’m hanging myself with the belt, you can use the scarf.”

  188. “We’ve secretly replaced this magazine’s models with Highland Fling (R) Kenneth Action Figures, sporting knits cunningly reproduced to scale, enhanced with Flavor Krystals ™! Will the Sirdar editor be able to tell the difference?”

  189. “I wouldn’t look so smug if I were you — the new guy in red shirt* is always the first to go and NEVER gets beamed back to the Enterprise. Me? I’m destined to be a Recurring Character!”
    *see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redshirt_(character)

  190. Blue guy: You know it takes a real man to wear a scarf, belt, and tight leather pants. I can just feel it sticking to my hot thighs. It drives women crazy, you know.
    Orange guy: Damn khaki pants!

  191. Re: comment 189 or somesuch… forgot to tell the comment thingy to remember my personal info…

  192. Mr. Blue: “I may explode if anyone else calls me KEN!”

  193. Mr. Blue: “I may explode if anyone else calls me KEN!”

  194. “I don’t think she wove in the ends very carefully–I can feel something tickling my ribcage…”

  195. Where is my fairy knit-mother when I need her? We can’t go to the ball dressed like this!
    So weak compared to “Queer Eye for the Star Trek guy”… why should the rest of us bother???

  196. “Does your wig itch too?”

  197. My entry:
    Guy in orange sweater to guy in blue sweater: “Are you ABSOLUTELY SURE this is how Sean Connery got started in his rise to fame?”

  198. “Hey, Phil…do you think we should try going to that Brawny camp for men?”
    (I can’t remember what they call that camp — the one put on by Brawny paper towels…)

  199. “Hey Biff, I’ve got this song stuck in my head ‘I’m a model you know what I mean And I do my little turn on the catwalk…’ Quick! think of another song.”

  200. “Hey Bob, how’s that stick up yer arse?”
    “Well just fine Rog’, how ’bout yours?”

  201. ” Hey Hank, Grab your handkerchief and we’ll go down yonder for a ride in my convertable Cadillac!”

  202. “And here we have an exhibit of the trailblazing [and often misunderstood] metrosexuals of yore!”

  203. ” Oh man, you know in 40+ years this picture is going to resurface. I am a chump for listening you Frank. You in your goofy scarf!”

  204. Well, here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten us into.

  205. “We’ve tried skydiving, mountain climbing and extreme skiing, but knitting is still our favorite sport! Aren’t these sweaters mahvelous?”

  206. Looks like Walter Matthau and Tony Curtis in the ODD couple!

  207. Looks like Walter Matthau and Tony Curtis in the ODD couple!

  208. Guy in rust: -If we keep smiling like this, maybe Kay’ll knit us Cornish Knit Frocks instead.

  209. Well, here goes:
    “Holy Kumquat Batman, we could’ve been killed!”
    “Yes, Robin, or Worse!”

  210. Oops. I forgot to INCLUDE my email addr.
    auntpollyfor4@yahoo.com

  211. Guy in Orange: ” ‘Zounds! Me thinkest thou dost protest too much about the sweater thou wearest. If thou wert a true and noble man, thou wouldst wear thy sweater proud.”
    Guy in Orange: “You need to lay off the late night Shakespeare.”

  212. “Reggie, I can’t believe you talked me into being photographed wearing this thing”.
    “Oh, don’t worry Brad. No one will ever see it. Now, does this belt and scarf make me look fat?”

  213. “Reggie, I can’t believe you talked me into being photographed wearing this thing”.
    “Oh, don’t worry Brad. No one will ever see it. Now, does this belt and scarf make me look fat?”

  214. Whoops! Sorry!

  215. Setting: New Hampshire, Cathedral of the Trees (or whatever that place is called)
    The guy in the blue is saying, “I cannot believe you’re not letting me wear a dress for our wedding portrait. Fine! Then I’ll wear my black leather pants, with the matching leather belt and black leather ascot!”
    His husband replies: “If the closet is good enough for Rock Hudson it’s good enough for us.”
    Charli
    Charlizeen at yahoo dot com

  216. “No , No Bill when they said we had a modelling job for Pullman they meant a knitting yarn company”

  217. Blue: “You’re not wearing THAT thing to our wedding, are you, Jerry?”
    Brown: “Why not? You’re wearing the exact same sweater I am, Edward.”
    Blue: “No I’m not, I have a scarf. And I wouldn’t be caught DEAD in acrylic!”

  218. blue guy; even in my girlfriends scarf and belt I am too sexy.
    orange guy; Im too sexy for my sweater.
    NO WAIT!!!!!
    blue guy; I am so not gay. I am so not gay.
    orange guy; He is so gay. He is so gay.

  219. “I don’t know about you. but knitters with big sticks are a huge turn-on for me!”

  220. “Steve, you wanna meet out back after the photo shoot is done?” wink, wink

  221. OK, I’m sorry I laughed. The scarf and belt are actually kinda hip!

  222. OK, I’m sorry I laughed. The scarf and belt are actually kinda hip!

  223. They are both thinking
    Groovy Baby……

  224. guy in blue…. “Yes…. I DO look so much better than you Ted, my silken ascot just adds something.Can you stand how suave I am?”
    Ted…. “Just smile for the camera…. ass.”

  225. My entry:
    Are you gellin’?
    Oh yeah, I’m gellin’.

  226. I’m serious, Jim, Gloria told me that chicks dig men in belted sweaters and silky scarves. Why would Gloria lie about a thing like that?

  227. Really Bingley, forget Jane Bennett, its best to stick with your own kind (wink wink)

  228. Cheese!

  229. The first thing that popped into my head…
    *singing*
    “Double the pleasure, double the fun…”
    or possibly that SNL skit with Dane Cook
    “Is that a turtleneck? Eww!”

  230. Arrrgh. Workin’ as a sweater model ’tis a disgraceful life fer a pirate.

  231. Belt and ascot:
    I feel stunning
    And entrancing–
    Feel like running and dancing for joy,
    For I’m loved
    By a pretty wonderful boy!
    Orange sweater:
    It must be the heat
    Or some rare disease
    Or too much to eat,
    Or maybe it’s fleas.

  232. I have subdued the alien that took over security guard 1 by use of clever accessories. Beam us up,Scotty!

  233. Orange guy: I’m so tired of sitting. Let’s change places.
    Blue guy: No way! My pants are so tight I can’t sit. Hey does this belt make my butt look big?

  234. “Beam us up Scotty – these new handknit uniforms are too warm!”

  235. a la Austin Powers:
    Do we make you horny? YEAH, BABY, YEAH!

  236. I don’t know if I can submit more than one entry but as I spent at least one hour last night thinking these bon mots up, when I should have been sleeping, I’ll give them all to you. The first and shortest is my favorite:
    1. Really, you had me at hello.
    2. My chin is too squarer than your chin!
    3. Blue guy to Orange guy: Puhleeze, orange is so last year.
    4. Orange guy to Blue guy: For Heaven’s sake, Frank, would you please stop humming “Eidelweiss”.
    5. Blue guy to Orange guy: If only I’d brought my lute.
    6. Orange guy to Blue guy: Oh my. . . look at that . . . I guess you’re right — bears do shit in the woods.
    7. Do you think we can get a nice merlot to go with those mooseburgers tonight?
    Keep ‘em coming girls. I like contests that make my gray cells work.
    Leslie
    P.S. Love your blog — I was having withdrawl pains there for awhile when you disappeared. Glad to have you back.

  237. roseydew@hotmail.com
    me again
    caption
    ralph and luren
    you could have told me you were a vampire

  238. Guy in Orange sweater: Why of course I’m not wearing a thong – only a fool wears a thong while camping!
    no tell me you didn’t Frank!
    Guy in blue sweater: god my thong is killing me and by the way I hate you –

  239. “Ken poses with his Madame Tussaud’s wax statue, but no one can figure out which is the real Ken and which is the statue.”

  240. “Ken poses with his Madame Tussaud’s wax statue, but no one can figure out which is the real Ken and which is the statue.”

  241. Oops! Sorry for the duplicate comment!

  242. I think Julie probably nailed it, but….
    “Space – To Boldly Go Where No Fashion Has Gone Before.”

  243. Blue: Sweetheart, you know this guy is no good for you!
    Orange: Aw come on dude, we’ve got the same taste in clothes, that’s gotta count for somethin’!

  244. I forgot to include my email
    lthf@sbcglobal.net

  245. I’m posting this again because I forgot my email addie,
    I’m tickled orange just knowing that next time, it’s MY turn to go to the special accessory box.
    rankinranch@hotmail.com

  246. Guy in orange sweater: You’re woman, right?!
    Guy in blue sweater: Humpf… and hate it!

  247. Blue Sweater guy: How long do we have to stand here like this?
    Orange Sweater guy: Shut up and smile would ya. The sooner we get this over the sooner we can go for a beer!

  248. “I’m Ken, this is my other brother Ken. How ’bout you bring old Skipper down and we can have us a little party, Barbie? You know you’re dying to use my manly cravat-scarfthing for nefarious purposes….”

  249. Do you think the skarf AND the belt are a little over the top? How about just the skarf, or maybe just the belt? No?

  250. Man in Blue: If only I was cool like Robin Hood!
    Man in Orange: You’ll always be my Robin Hood.

  251. Do you think the belt and scarf are too much? Does the belt make me look fat?

  252. “SHUT UP! It was the first thing I could find to cover up the hickey.”

  253. “Why, Robin (in blue), is that Maid Marion coming through Sherwood Forest?” said Friar Tuck (in brown)

  254. “Mandy! Susie! How nice to see you! We were just having a stroll.”
    I have an old leaflet with the same models, and I don’t think they’d be that glad to see Mandy and Susie.

  255. (in blue) smugly, “I kicked your ass, that’s why I get to wear the scarf AND the belt!”
    In pumpkin: “I let you win, now you look like a dork!”

  256. Black scarf $15
    Matching belt $30
    Turtleneck sweaters $80
    Leather pants $250
    Camel toe……priceless
    or
    Walk in the woods with loved ones….priceless!

  257. The man may make the sweater, but darling, accessories are EVERYTHING.

  258. I am still laughing about The Queer Eye for the Star Trek Guy!
    Mine-
    Ken- “I thought this shoot was for a Chic Pirate magazine”
    Dave- “Aarrgh!”

  259. “There’s something about an Aqua Velva man!”

  260. My caption entry:
    Why does everyone assume we’re gay?

  261. My caption entry:
    Why does everyone assume we’re gay?

  262. Guy 1: After this is over, I’m going back to my wife.
    Guy 2: No, you’re not.

  263. 1. “There’s something about an Aqua Velva man!”
    or
    2. We’re just a couple of wild and crazy guys!
    frenme@earthlink.net

  264. Comment: George, I’ve tried to tell your mother 4 times that we’re a couple but she’s only interested in her knitting.

  265. 1. “There’s something about an Aqua Velva man!”
    or
    2. We’re just a couple of wild and crazy guys!
    frenme@earthlink.net

  266. Comment: George, I’ve tried to tell your mother 4 times that we’re a couple but she’s only interested in her knitting.

  267. Comment: George, I’ve tried to tell your mother 4 times that we’re a couple but she’s only interested in her knitting.

  268. Comment: George, I’ve tried to tell your mother 4 times that we’re a couple but she’s only interested in her knitting.

  269. Does this ascot make my butt look fat?
    You ARE an ascot.
    But- I’m never gonna quit you.

  270. Sorry about the double post but first post had the wrong (old) e-mail. I was overcome with the manly men in the contest!
    1. “There’s something about an Aqua Velva man!”
    or
    2. We’re just a couple of wild and crazy guys!
    miss2fied@yahoo.com

  271. brown guy: Hey Biff is that Stacy from “What Not To Wear”?
    blue guy: Oh, she will so dig my outfit.

  272. A swash-buckling pirate who appreciates handknits. THAT will impress the women!

  273. “Yes, this is the same ensemble that inspired AC/DC’s “Big Balls”.”

  274. “I’m a doctor, not a bricklayer!”

  275. Man in Blue: Just remember, I’m getting the big bucks…I’m getting paid big bucks…it’s almost over…gotta hang in for a few more minutes.
    Man in orange: Gotta smile…I’m getting paid, but Thank GOD I don’t have to wear a scarf.

  276. Mom always liked ME best!

  277. Mom always liked ME best!

  278. Can someone please direct us to the Mountie enlistment office?

  279. These family reunions are always so awkward.

  280. “We are new to the Monteagle area and was wondering if you could point us in the direction of the nearest..eh-hem ‘alternative’ bar?”
    I love contests…I just need to learn how to knit. :-)

  281. OK, I could not resist this one:
    “Ooh, that shade of blue matches your eyes perfectly!”
    “Cool it, I’m spoken for.”

  282. “Guess who just had a colonoscopy!”

  283. Go out on a limb for the Lumberjack in your life! These snazzy sweaters will have your man “leafing” for joy.

  284. Say, Biff, does this blue sweater make me look like Hank Azaria playing a gay Paul Bunyan on broadway?

  285. Blue: I think I nailed my Star Trek audition.
    Orange: I just wish you’d stop wearing the outfit.
    Blue: Jealous much?

  286. Please don’t beam us up, Scotty. The natives have dressed us like dorks.

  287. “Hey Sigfried! Watch out for that tiger!!!”

  288. My wife told me not to tell anyone, but she hand made our toupees, too.

  289. I only wish I had posted it first because it was exactly what I was thinking:
    “Queer Eye for the Star Trek Guy”
    Kudos
    Perhaps another take:
    “Don’t miss this week’s episode when the Queer Eyed Star Trek Guy proudly shows off how he transformed his shlumpy twin into a passable straight guy”

  290. What men?

  291. oopps almost forgot my email: vgardiner1971@yahoo.com

  292. “Thank god they didn’t ask me to wear that scarf and belt. Dork!”

  293. Guy in orange: Is he still behind me? Yeah? …how about now? Still there?

  294. I was driven to this caption after starting to knit old ripped up t-shirts from the recycling barn…
    Before we were married my wife’s knitting habit seemed so cute and clever…now just look at me!
    -or-
    You think this is bad…you should see our house!

  295. Ron: Why did Hermione insist on making our Poly Juice potion from THOSE Muggles? Fred and George would laugh their ears off if they saw us. Harry: I wanted to use the Invisibility Cloak.

  296. “Check out our extreme buffiness”

  297. Say Little John, let’s get back to Sherwood Forest and see what the other merry men are up to shall we?

  298. A scarf, Really?

  299. I was so mesmerized by the reallllllly bad hair on the “men” that I forgot my e-mail address gingersiminski@yahoo.com

  300. Kip (in orange): Who are these 2 ladies and why did they drag us out of the cafe to model their knitwear? Something about a book? I mean, I know we’re good-looking, but seriously…
    Thad (in blue): I know – good thing I had my belt and scarf or this outfit would be a disater! Maybe if I give them my “we are not amused” look they’ll let us get back to our lattes!

  301. Spock, don’t you think they could have chosen a better color for the Captain’s tunic?
    Jim, I don’t want to hear it. Have you even looked at the flimsy belt I’m supposed to attach the phaser and the communicator to?

  302. Brylcreme…….a little dab’ll do ya !!

  303. “I feel pretty, oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and GAY!!!”

  304. “Holy haberdashery, Batman! The joker’s turned our hair into poly-vinyl chloride.”
    I don’t stand a chance with the stiff competition, but here’s my info anyway: lissa dot story at nuance dot com.

  305. Blue guy-“I’m so happy I’m standing becaue my pants are evern tighter than his”
    Orange guy-“But the good news is that mine are now split open in the back, that’s whay I’m smiling, in relief!”

  306. Blue guy-“I’m so happy I’m standing becaue my pants are evern tighter than his”
    Orange guy-“But the good news is that mine are now split open in the back, that’s whay I’m smiling, in relief!”

  307. Contest entry –
    Blue: Suppose this will do for the Metrosexual Gunslinger competition? I don’t want to overdo it.
    Orange: Don’t worry about it, you’re fabulous.
    Blue: Oh, you.

  308. “I know I said the scarf and belt made him look gay, but you’re joking about me wearing the assless chaps for the next photo, right? You are joking, aren’t you??”

  309. “If the women don’t find you handy, they should at least find you handsome!!”

  310. “I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay…”
    “I wish I’d been a girlie just like my dear papa…”
    Monty Python would’ve had a field day with that pic.

  311. Im O.K. youre O.K.

  312. John and Steven thought their secret was safe. However, the ascot and buttless chaps were a dead giveaway.

  313. You look so hot in that jumper – you’ll look even hotter when I tear it of you!

  314. I love the vintage patterns!
    I’m not sure if you’re looking for something “knitterly” or not, but the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the two guys was, “Do you think the wives suspect?!”

  315. “Ribbed, for our pleasure”
    *sorry that was just plain BAD.

  316. I sure hope these are seamed using the mattress stitch!

  317. “Photographic evidence of alien presence as early as the mid-20th century.”
    Regarding the ruffled scarf, if you use an eyelash/ furry yarn for the final row or 2, you get a fun boa effect, beloved by 8-10 year old girls. Anyone trying this pattern should use the longest circulars they have.

  318. Orange Guy: “That’s nifty neck scarf you have to match your belt….yo momma dress you this moring?”
    Blue Guy: “Just because I still live with my parents does not imbue you the right to yo momma jokes. Besides, it was *your* momma who dressed me, after we spent a most lovely evening together last night.”

  319. “Hey Franz, the Super Hero contest is TOMORROW!”

  320. “Hey Franz, the Super Hero contest is TOMORROW!”

  321. Best. Contest. Ever. These ideas are hilarious. I won’t even try to top them. How you will ever decide the winner, I can’t imagine. Thanks for prompting these great laughs.

  322. New for the Fall 2007 tv line-up: “I Dream of Gene” – A United States astronaut finds his life vastly complicated when he stumbles on to a bottle containing a genie.

  323. “D**n it, Jim. I just can’t get Spock to knit. He’s says is ‘so illogical.'”

  324. “D**n it, Jim. I just can’t get Spock to knit. He’s says is ‘so illogical.'”
    ntgamelin at comcast dot net
    (Not sure how you get my email address; sorry for the double post!)

  325. Dr. McCoy Model: “Dammit Jim, I’m a doctor, not a model!”
    Unknown Auxiliary Model: “At least my sweater isn’t red.”

  326. Hee, I love that I’m not the only one who went to StarTrek (the original series) with the guy in blue.

  327. “Holy hairstyles, Caped Crusader! Are you sure these disguises will fool the Riddler?”

  328. My husband just accompanied me for the first time to a yarn store and was impressed by a ball winder– if I showed hime these patterns he might be turned off from knitting forever…..

  329. My husband just accompanied me for the first time to a yarn store and was impressed by a ball winder– if I showed hime these patterns he might be turned off from knitting forever…..

  330. My husband just accompanied me for the first time to a yarn store and was impressed by a ball winder– if I showed hime these patterns he might be turned off from knitting forever…..

  331. Orange guy: “Hey, sweetheart, I’m hotter than Captain Kirk! Come let my smile woo you.”
    Blue Guy: “There he goes again. When everyone knows that *I’m* a young, heart-throb version of Spock-Scottie.”

  332. Orange guy: “Hey, sweetheart, I’m hotter than Captain Kirk! Come let my smile woo you.”
    Blue Guy: “There he goes again. When everyone knows that *I’m* a young, heart-throb version of Spock-Scottie.”

  333. Orange guy: I should have used Preparation H.
    Blue guy: Yes, and Gas-X too!

  334. Here’s my contribution!
    Blue sweater (thru smile and teeth, lips barely moving): are you thinking what I’m thinking?
    Rust sweater (thru smile and teeth, lips barely moving): yes if you’re thinking that you might get lucky with the hunk behind the camera!
    Blue sweater (still smiling): puhleeze get your brain out of the gutter.
    Rust sweater (still smiling): why? your’s needs company.
    Blue sweater (smiling harder): aren’t we just in a mood?
    Rust sweater (smiling harder): well, are you thinking what i’m thinking?

  335. Here’s my contribution!
    Blue sweater (thru smile and teeth, lips barely moving): are you thinking what I’m thinking?
    Rust sweater (thru smile and teeth, lips barely moving): yes if you’re thinking that you might get lucky with the hunk behind the camera!
    Blue sweater (still smiling): puhleeze get your brain out of the gutter.
    Rust sweater (still smiling): why? your’s needs company.
    Blue sweater (smiling harder): aren’t we just in a mood?
    Rust sweater (smiling harder): well, are you thinking what i’m thinking?

  336. Man in orange: “If I said you had a beautiful sweater, would you hold it against me?”
    Man in blue: (maintains current facial expression)

  337. They’re saying nothing. The caption says it all. It reads:
    Here we find the utterly delightful Lord Walter Whimsy (at left), joined by his manservant Horatio P. Duckworth, as they model the latest in fashion from London’s hottest Carnaby Street Shop, “Cameltoe Brigade.”

  338. “That leather belt sure makes for a good spanking!”

  339. Orange sweater guy: “If you think I look silly, you should see the guy behind me. Are those leather pants?”

  340. Botox? What Botox? I don’t need no stinkin’ Botox

  341. I just now realized there’s a typo in my entry (even though I read it and edited it more than once before submitting it! *dork*).
    Here’s what I meant to say…
    “D*mn it, Jim. I just can’t get Spock to knit. He’s says it’s ‘so illogical.'”
    ntgamelin at comcast dot net

  342. “I’m so glad I didn’t have to wear a belt and scarf— he looks so ridiculous and I am so hot.”

  343. Donald Rumsfeld began to feel modeling was not the career path for him, and soon left for a life in civil service.

  344. Come on- we can’t both go the convention dressed as casual Captain Kirk!

  345. ribbed. for his pleasure.

  346. Mr. Blue: “So… this is Monteagle.”
    Mr. Orange: “Yeah, and don’t worry, I brought plenty of Carnation Instant Breakfast!”
    (I know, no comparison to “Queer Eye for the Star Trek guy.” I bow to Julie!)

  347. Orange Sweater: Stop pouting Todd, I was not flirting with the stylist.
    Blue Sweater: You never look at me like that anymore *sniff*
    allyson_305 at hotmail.com

  348. Your sweater’s orange, my sweater’s blue, Star Trek’s been cancelled, now what do we do?
    From my brother, Charles. xo

  349. Your sweater’s orange, my sweater’s blue, Star Trek’s been cancelled, now what do we do?
    From my brother, Charles. xo

  350. “Why didn’t I get a snazzy belt too?!!”

  351. i have at least 2 of those pattern books– i personally love ‘em. (in an awkward, and could-never-wear-anything-in ‘em, way.)

  352. I realize this is late, but that is the way my mom brain works.
    Can we call these caption contests LOLKNITS?
    If so, here’s my entry:
    WE R OUTTA TEH CLOZET, WEARIN UR SWETTERZ!!!
    Cheerio, ladies. No, seriously, Cheerio? I got some here in my bra.

  353. I know the contest is over, but for the record, I think those guys are saying something like this:
    “well, Ken, I think we’ve had about as much fun on this planet as there is to be had. Beam us up, Scottie!”

  354. Orange: I’ll make you some nice wool boxers next.
    Blue: Okay, but only if you do the sizing to make a perfect fit.