What a night! What pfaffed-up TV knit nite! I blame it on a mini-binge of the most recent episodes of Nashville. (The entire economy of this city hinges on whether ABC is going to renew the show for a fifth season. We are not going to survive if this TV soap opera is shut down. Somebody cook up a Kickstarter.)
I finished casting off the final stitch of Kieran Foley’s Kerchief, and it looked like this:
Yay! A wacky border on a little kerchief.
What a snaky, curly, tangly edge. I thought: Wow, that Kieran Foley is an intrepid designer. Who would have ever designed such a pile of stitches on a little kerchief pattern?
The answer, of course, is nobody.
Somehow, I doubled the number of stitches in the border. DOUBLED THEM. The basic premise of this kerchief is constant increases, so I was all in on the increasing.
Cramming a thousand stitches on a needle didn’t raise a red flag. I thought: You go, Kieran! You make us knitters work for our border!
The border should have 40 pointy bits. See?
The pattern creates 40 points if you follow the directions. I, on the other hand, created 78 points. Have you ever seen such a mess? Can you believe I patiently and quietly cast off 1,170 stitches without having the thought, Gee, this is a hell of a lot of edge stitches for a project uses only 420 yards of yarn.
One woman’s knitting disaster is another woman’s blocking fantasy come true. Filled with loathing; filled with joy—isn’t that life? I couldn’t wait to see how this thing would pin out. As a believer in the mighty redemptive power of blocking, I just knew that a stern pin-down would make something of what looked like a hot mess.
I gave it a spin in my OXO Salad Spinner/Demoistening Device.
I used all my sharpest pins.
It is clear that this edge is going to be a ruffle.
A really ruffly ruffle. When the ruffle is a thousand stitches wide, it is going to be super ruffly.
For scale, the center line is 13″—this is not a big piece of knitting. My plan is to leave it on the blocking board for days.
I think I am going to love this kerchief. And Kieran Foley hasn’t heard the last of me wrecking I mean knitting his patterns . . .
I turned my back for four minutes.
Soaking wet, didn’t matter. I AM HEAR TO HELP YOU FOOD LADY IN YOUR HOUR OF NEED #helpfulknittingcats
PS Now obsessed with my overshoot on the border, I have studied a bunch of Kerchief projects on Ravelry, and I have counted projects with 45, 38, 42, 40, and 58 points. So weird. You blow your stitch count during the eyelet section increases, and your fate is sealed.
PSS For those who want to make this pattern (and you should–it’s great), my doom was sealed in Row 1 of the Eyelet section. I did an entire row of yarnover/knit 1 where I should have simply knit, thus doubling the stitch count from 331 to 662. The increases in the border took the stitch count over 1,000. It is a testament to the TV show Nashville that I didn’t even stop to count at any time during this border. See, ABC? Nashville fans lose all touch with reality when watching that show. Renew Nashville!